Union Wants Share of Pork

United Auto Workers (UAW) President Shawn Fain is withholding his union's endorsement of the reelection of President Biden "until we get our fair share. If he can afford to pour billions of dollars into subsidizing the corporations for the electric vehicle transition he can afford to subsidize us too."

Fain expressed concern that "phasing out gasoline-powered vehicles could cost our members their jobs. The commitment to unprofitable electric vehicles needs to have protections for the workers who assemble them. We're waiting to see what the President is willing to offer us for our support."

Presidential Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre said "the President remains confident that the UAW will come around to support him. Fain has already said that there is no way they will support Trump. Given that Trump is the odds on favorite to win the Republican nomination the UAW will have no choice but to back President Biden's reelection. So, rather than using threats, getting aboard earlier rather than later is the safest choice."

In related news, a study done in the UK showed that between 2020 and 2023 electric vehicles (EVs) have lost value faster than gasoline-powered vehicles. The Tesla Model S lost 46% of its value at purchase, the Nissan Leaf lost 58%, the Hyundai Ioniq lost 67%, and the BMW i3 lost 64%. Over this period cars using gasoline lost an average of 37% of their starting value. US Secretary of Energy Jennifer Granholm called the accelerated depreciation of EVs "a necessary sacrifice in our quest for an emission-free transportation system. Just remember to park your EV out front so you get credit from your neighbors for making this sacrifice."

SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE by John Semmens